Dance Dance Fantasy!
by Binkari
Summary: Some mild language and er...suggestive themes. Other than that, happy dancing N*SeeD wannabes. FINAL CHAPTER ADDED! Please, R
1. Getting It Together

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Author's Note: the boring disclaimer...RETURNS! None of the characters belong to me. Not even Carbuncle *sob*. *coughs* Enjoy!   
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[randomness..nothing to do with the story, but..nya.]  
  
Seifer: Edea...can I have a GF?  
Edea: No.  
Seifer: Why not?!  
Edea: Because...  
Seifer: Because what?  
Edea: Are you arguing with me?  
Seifer: Ye--  
Edea: Don't answer that.  
  
[Back to the actual story.]  
  
Squall sat at the edge of his bed boredly. There was nothing to do nowadays. With the Garden mobile, everyone seemed either panicked or seasick. Squall was...blah. He didn't show that much emotion, and as a result, did not feel that much either.   
  
Getting up, the young man walked over to his desk and clicked on the "New Messages" button in his inbox. He clicked on the many spam messages he got, only seeing a few from people he actually knew. One caught his eye, 'From: Selphie Tilmitt Subject: We need your help...'  
  
Smirking slightly, Squall read the message:   
  
'Squally-man,  
  
We need your help at the quad. Meet us there at 4 P.M. Don't be late, or we'll sic Seifer on you. Teehee!  
  
Selphie'  
  
His blues eyes read the message once more, as if his brain couldn't contempelate it before. Closing the message, Squall read the rest of the messages with little interest. Peering over at the clock, he checked the time: 3:22 P.M. 'Plenty of time,' he thought to himself.   
  
Nevertheless, Squall didn't want to be late for anything. Slinging the jacket over his well-built shoulders, he walked out the door, spitting out a bit of the fur from the collar. "Pft. Stupid fur-lined collar. I knew I should have stuck with all leather. Oiy, these pants are killing me. Oh...must look cool," he mumbled to himself.  
  
Squall made his way along Garden, looking down at the ground all the while. "Squall!" a voice shouted ahead of him.  
  
Squall looked up and saw a small figure running towards him. Blonde hair, baggy shorts, gloves over his hands. It could be none other than..."Hey, Squall!" said Zell, "You headed to the Quad?"  
  
The brunette nodded, looking to the side. "All right, Selphie's waiting for ya," Zell pointed down the walkway.  
  
Squall shook his head, brown locks flipping over his eyes. He continued down the path, Zell following close behind him. Arriving at the Quad, Squall headed down the stairs and saw Selphie, Quistis, Irvine, Rinoa, and Seifer standing the stage. "What's going on?" he asked in a monotonous tone.  
  
Quistis grabbed Squall's hand and pulled him on the stage, "Get over here, hot stuff."  
  
"What? I'm not hot?" Irvine whined.  
  
Seifer smacked Irvine upside the head, "Quiet, cowboy."  
  
"Teehee!" giggled Selphie, "Ok everyone, here's the thing..."  
  
The group congregated, Squall being held captive by Quistis' firm grip. "WHAT?!" Zell exclaimed, "I'm NOT dancing!"  
  
"Oh yes you are!" Selphie pouted, hands on her hips.  
  
"I'd do ANYTHING for you, Selphie, darling," Irvine purred, attempting to runn his fingers through Selphie's helmet hair.  
  
"...." went Squall.  
  
"You can dance just fine, Chicken-wuss. I mean, I see you hop around everyday, flapping your arms around everywhere," Seifer chuckled.  
  
"I'm NOT dancing, I'm practicing martial arts!" Zell shouted back, his hands shaking.  
  
"Yeah yeah," Seifer waved his hand a bit.  
  
"Ok, enough talk, more dancing!" Selphie ordered, pointed to the center of the stage.  
  
"Wait, Selphie," Quistis pointed out, "None of us have been trained to dance."  
  
"Don't think so negative, Quisty! I'll teach ya!" Selphie snickered.  
  
"Oh god, help us all," Seifer groaned, rolling his eyes.  
  
Irvine stepped up and started executing a coffee grinder effortlessly. Everyone just stared at him wided-eye and flabbergasted (What a funny word...hehe). "Uhm, where did you learn that, Irvine?" Selphie questioned.  
  
"Hey, dance moves catch a girl's eye like no othe--I mean...I'm talented," Irvine responded, lying on the ground prone and in a playboy bunny-like pose.  
  
Squall, Seifer, Zell, and Quistis rolled their eyes at Irvine's attempted seductiveness. "Yo, cowboy, that's not how you pose. Lemme show you how it's done," Seifer pushed Irvine away and got on his knees, legs spread, hands on his thighs and smirked.  
  
Selphie and Rinoa looked at him as if he could puke. "See? I'm getting a reaction and I'm not even wearing tight leather pants!" Seifer grinned.  
  
"...Whatever," Squall mumbled, "Why are we here again?"  
  
"Oh um, we're having a talent show!" Selphie exclaimed.  
  
"WHAT?!" the others gasped.  
  
"Another one?" Quistis asked, already thoroughly embarrased from having to play the violin in the last one for Squall.  
  
"I'm out," Seifer grumbled, walking off.  
  
He didn't get far, since Selphie tackled him to the ground. "Seifer, you can't leave, you have to be the main dancer!"  
  
"EXCUSE ME?!" Seifer screamed, pushing Selphie off and running for the door.  
  
Selphie narrowed her usually round, perky eyes to little slits and pointed after Seifer, "Get 'im..."  
  
The others, as if hypnotized, or just scared, ran after Seifer. They came back, dragging the screaming and kicking blonde with them. Seifer was looking rather disgruntled. His trenchcoat hung off one shoulder and the collar was completely disoriented. The back of his pants at the ankle was stained from oil when Zell chucked a hot dog at him. Selphie walked up to him slowly, a sadistic smile over her face, "Now...shall we get moving?"  
  
"Hrmph," Seifer grunted. 


	2. Costumes!

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Disclaimer: They don't belong to me.  
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"Selphie, I'm NOT wearing this," Quistis complained, holding up the shiny pink mini skirt Selphie had instructed her to put on.  
  
"Come on, Quisty! You have pretty legs!" Selphie engouraged.  
  
"Really?" Quistis looked down at her legs, "Ya think?"  
  
"Uh huh!" Selphie clapped, looking hopeful.  
  
"Hmm...I'll give it a try," the blonde said thoughtfully and walked into the dressing rooms again.  
  
Seifer walked out in the outfit Selphie forced him to wear. He wore a vinyl trenchcoat which allowed VERY little air in or out. He didn't mind to combat boots all that much, but the Squall-ish leather pants were a little much. the heavy leather belt with the huge buckle weighed about as much as the chain that hung heavy at his hips. At his side was his trusty Hyperion...slathered in baby blue paint. "Dear god, Selph...you've GOT to be kidding," he whined, the pants seeming to cut off his circulation.  
  
"Nope!" Selphie giggled, "Oh my! We'll have to do something about that hair!"  
  
"Eh?" Seifer quirked a brow, "Don't touch my hair..."  
  
"Oh fine."  
  
Selphie skipped over to the dressing rooms, stopping in front of Squall's and knocked on the curtain (is that possible...?). "Squa-all! Lemme see!"  
  
"I'm not coming out," Squall mumbled.  
  
"C'mon! I wanna see how cute you look!" Selphie begged.  
  
"...whatever."  
  
"Don't make me come in there!" Selphie threatened.  
  
"I won't."  
  
"Grr!" Selphie burst into his room, but seeing him in his boxers, she ran back out, "Sorry, Squall! Put some pants on!"  
  
Squall did his infamous mumbled and pulled the curtain over the opening again. He finally came out, a beanie atop his head, puffy genie pants adorning his long legs. "Selp, I feel stupid," he groaned.  
  
"Oh, you look adorable!" Selphie reassured him.  
  
"I look like Rajin," he pointed out.  
  
Just then, Seifer walked past. Eyeing Squall, he busted out laughing, but his laughter was stifled by the constraining pants. "Damnit, puberty boy, I don't get how you can wear these pants!"  
  
"Don't worry Seifer! Your body will shape itself into those pants soon!" Selphie snickered.  
  
"What?" Seifer asked, somewhat panicked.  
  
"Nothing..."  
  
Seifer hobbled off again. He seemed to be having problems bending down...or bending his knees for that matter. Zell flounced over to Selphie and Squall, followed by Quistis in the mini-skirt. Quistis was having problems wearing the platforms, so she plucked them off and walked over gingerly on her bare feet. Zell stood there, rather proud of his costume: baggy shorts, red vest, and black t-shirt. "Whadya think of my costume?" Zell asked, modelling it for everyone.  
  
"That's the same thing you wear everyday!" Seifer shouted, being too tired to walk his way back over to the crowd.  
  
"Darn tootin'! Where are the hot dogs?"   
  
Zell wandered off. Quistis adjusted the mini-skirt, pulling it down over her well-toned thighs. "HOT DIGGITY!" Irvine gawked at Quistis' long, toned, and slender legs.  
  
"What the?" Quistis looked over her shoulder.  
  
Irvine licked his lips, but caught himself and regained his composure. "Lookin' good there, blondie," he said, tipping his hat, long locks of auburn falling over his eyes.  
  
Squall rolled his eyes and walked off. Quistis reached into the pocket of the blouse and pulled out the note she had got some Selphie before, but dropped it on the floor. She bent over (which was quite a challenge since the skirt was so short and she had enough dignity not to flash anything at the gawker behind her.), and picked up the piece of paper. Unfortunately, Irvine noticed, "Sweet! She should do that more!"  
  
Quistis leered at him and walked off to where Selphie, Seifer, and Squall were. "Ok, now we just have to wait for Rinoa, and the dancing will begin!" Selphie cheered.   
  
The perky brunette ran off back to the changing rooms and returned with Rinoa dressed in a pair of capris and a simple tank top. "Ok, I don't get it, Selphie," Quistis complained, "Why doesn't Rinoa wear the mini-skirt and tube top? She wore it to the dance and tried to seduce Squall that way."  
  
"She what?" Squall's eyes opening a little.  
  
"Er...she tried to introduce you!" Selphie said, trying to cover up what Quistis said.  
  
"Introduce me to who?" Squall questioned.  
  
"No one."  
  
"...Whatever."  
  
Seifer roared, "Can we PLEASE get moving?! These pants are hurting places I don't think are appropiate to mention!"  
  
"Fine fine. Let's get moving!" Selphie said happily and ran off to the stage.  
  
Everyone mingled around a bit before actually making their way to the stage, where Selphie was dancing with Irvine. Looking over her shoulder, she pushed Irvine away and patted down her hair. She cleared her throat and looked over everyone. "Hmm, the costumes look good, get into some comfortable clothes and let's get groovin'!" 


	3. Practice Makes Perfect...Kinda.

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Disclaimer: In case you didn't read the disclaimers in the last two chapters...none of the characters are mine. They belong to Squaresoft and only to Squaresoft. (___)--Insert heavy sigh of depression here.  
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"All right! Everyone here?" Selphie scanned the group, seeing only looked of melancholy and annoyance.  
  
She grinned, ignoring the irritated members and jumped in the air. "Okie! Let's get dancin'! Our first move: shimmies!"  
  
Everyone's eyes widened, Selphie's narrowed. The dance group coughed and did their best shimmies in fear that Selphie would get pissed off at them if they didn't. Squall's looked more like repeatitive shoulder scrunch, something he was good at. Seifer's was somewhat decent, even though the evil scowl on his face didn't really match with the move. Quistis' was quite nice and Selphie wondered if she had taken dance lessons before. Rinoa's was merely ok, not broadway material. Irvine's was...perfect.  
  
"Irvine, where did you learn to dance like that?" Selphie asked.  
  
"I dunno, it's natural, along with my rugged good looks and sexy personalit--"  
  
He was cut off by a smack in the back of head. "Geezus, shut up," Seifer's voice grunted.  
  
"Not my fault you can't shimmy!" Irvine whimpered.  
  
Zell ran in, and saw everyone shimmying. He thought they were doing something else and walked over, "Is there a contagious disease that causes shoulder spasms?"  
  
"...." mumbled Squall as he stopped.  
  
"Ok, sorry," Zell apologized and shimmied for a bit too.  
  
"People! Move those shoulders faster!" Selphie commanded, her shoulders seeming to vibrate more than shake.  
  
"My shoulders hurt!" Rinoa whined.  
  
"Fine. Ok, guys, you're the only ones I need right now, the girls can watch," Selphie motioned Squall, Seifer, Zell, and Irvine to step up.  
  
"What now?" Zell asked, jumping up and down a bit.  
  
"Pelvic thrusts!" Selphie snickered.  
  
Zell stopped jumping. Seifer and Squall looked at Selphie in disbelief. Irvine stood there, a beaming grin on his face. "Don't act stupid! You know what they are!" Rinoa yelled at the men.  
  
"Oh please..." Seifer said, rolling his eyes.   
  
"Enough talk! And one!" Selphie ordered, thrusting her hips forward.  
  
Irvine imitated it perfectly. Seifer stood there while Squall tried to sneak away. Zell glared at Irvine and shoved his pelvis forward, trying to match him. Quistis and Rinoa giggled. Squall jumped off the stage, but Zell grabbed him, "You gotta suffer with me!"  
  
Seifer took advantage of this and tried to run off, but Irvine stopped him. "Aw, come on, it's not that bad! The girls love it!" Irvine said with a wink  
  
Seifer blinked at him and then sighed, returning to the stage. "Stop trying to run off and work those hips! And one! And two!" Selphie laughed.  
  
Squall rolled his eyes and did a thrust, causing Rinoa to faint. Quistis coughed a bit and looked away, but couldn't help taking a peek at what Seifer was doing. Slowly, one by one, the men became more excited with the movement until Selphie had to force them to stop. "Now we all gotta do sound effects! Everyone, go 'HOY'!"  
  
"HOY!" grunted the guys.  
  
Selphie giggled and called the girls up. "Okie, we're gonna still work on the hips! Except the girls are gonna shake those bon bons!"  
  
Rinoa fainted...again. "Leave her, she couldn't dance anyways," Selphie muttered.  
  
"Can I have her costume then?" Quistis asked.  
  
"Sure!" Selphie chimed, "Ok, NOW SHAKE THOSE HIPS! And one and two and one and two! FASTER!"  
  
Quistis looked around, "Hey wait, Selphie, I'm the only girl besides you."  
  
"Exactly!" Selphie exclaimed.  
  
Quistis shrugged and shook her hips side to side, the guys' staring at her, mouths open. Seifer wiped the drool from his lips, "Damn! I shoulda gotten with her when I got the chance!"  
  
"Forget Rinoa! Quistis is mine!" Squall warned.  
  
"What are you talking about? She likes me more!" Zell screamed.  
  
"Selphie's the hottest!" Irvine screamed at the two of them.  
  
Selphie smiled and winked at Irvine. "I think we got the hip shaking down. Now let's get this dance together!"  
  
Everyone once again met at the center of the stage. "Mmk, first we start out with Seifer. He walks on stage in a strut like this..." Selphie demonstrates. "And then Quistis comes in and shakes her hips like we just practiced. Quistis has to act hard to get. Then Squall and Zell come in. They'll do a little number on the side, I'll show you what later. Irvine will come up and do a little dance on his own. Seifer and Quistis will join Squall and Zell then."  
  
The group looked at Selphie and then nodded, not really knowing what was going on, but still nodding. Selphie grinned and showed everyone their places. "Ok, I don't have a song to dance to yet..."  
  
Groans. "But! I'm gonna have Squall write us a song!"  
  
"Pardon?" Squall said, seemingly not hearing right.  
  
"You're gonna write us a song!" Selphie repeated.  
  
"...whatever."  
  
Seifer stepped up, "How's this?  
  
"I never knew what I hated until I saw you.  
"I wanted to chop you up good.  
"From your head to your toes, and I wanted to slice you up goo--"  
  
"Uh..I don't think so, Seifer," Selphie interrupted, "Squall, I chose you because I think you need to show a little more enthusiam! Teehee!"  
  
"Can't we just dance to another song? One that's already been made?" Quistis asked.  
  
"Oh fine! Let's see...How about 'Chained to You' by Savage Garden?" Selphie said thoughtfully.  
  
"Sounds good to me," Quistis agreed.  
  
"...whatever."  
  
"I still think my 'Chop You Up Good' was better."  
  
"Wait! How about 'Kung Fu Fighting' by Bus Stop Feat?" Selphie suggested.  
  
"YEAH!" Zell said happily, leaping into the air and kicking out.   
  
His kick hit Seifer square on the nose and managing to knock him in a coma-like state. "Oh crap."  
  
Squall looked over Seifer, "Good going, Zell. You should do that more often."  
  
"I should, shouldn't I?" Zell grinned, rubbing the back of his head.   



	4. The Plan

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Boring Disclaimer: (Do I need one on each chapter?) none of the characters belong to me. They're all © Squaresoft.  
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Seifer awoke from his little trip to LaLaLand and looked around. Everyone was dressed in karate costumes, so he assumed that they were doing that Kung Fu song. Zell seemed perfectly in place, kicking and punching the enemies that didn't exist. Squall was hunched over on the bench, glaring at the others. "Oh! You're awake!" Selphie hopped over to Seifer and put a costume in front of his face, "You're gonna wear this!"  
  
"Great..." Seifer mumbled as he took the costume and walked off to the dressing rooms.  
  
Seifer came out clad in the white uniform, his body was VERY well-built and he looked quite nice in the costume. He grinned proudly as Quistis did a little cat-call at him. Rinoa looked at Seifer, then at Squall, "SQUA-ALL! Why can't YOU look sexy like that?! Look sexy like Seifer!"  
  
"...." was Squall's only reply.  
  
"SQUALL!" Rinoa screamed, her high pitched voice was so far out of human ears that Angelo ran for cover.  
  
"Rinoa...please shut up," Quistis said, patting the hernia-prone girl on the shoulder.  
  
Rinoa gasped for breath, "Fi-ne...SELPHIEEEEE!! Why can't I dance?! I wanna do pelvic thrusts with Squally-poo!"  
  
"UGH," Squall groaned as he marched off to a changing room.  
  
He didn't get far, since Rinoa clung onto him like a wet blanket, right on the leg. He used his other foot to try and kick her off, but Rinoa said, "You wouldn't hurt a pretty face like this? Would you?"  
  
She gave little anime sparkle eyes and Squall gagged, "I wouldn't...but you're not pretty."  
  
"WHAT?!" Rinoa's mouth dropped open.  
  
Squall pried her off his leg and walked back to the group, Rinoa face down on the ground, sobbing her beady little eyes out. Seifer sat, there, chuckling. Selphie coughed and whispered, "Irvine...change your boxers."  
  
"Huh?" Irvine asked, confused.  
  
"Change your boxers..." Selphie repeated.  
  
"Oh Selphie, don't look there you naughty naughty girl!" he giggled insanely.  
  
"Yo, Irvine, the pretty pink pansies on your boxers want out," Seifer said, mockingly.  
  
"Eh?" Irvine looked down.  
  
Sure enough, the white pants were a little see-through and the pink flowers on his boxers were leaking through the thin spots. "Ah crap," Irvine groaned as he walked off to change...again.  
  
"So when are you gonna get this going?" Zell asked, still punching the air until Seifer pushed him into the bushes.   
  
"Hey Quistis...nice uniform, you're lookin' pretty fine there!" Seifer commented with a wink.  
  
Quistis couldn't help but blush a bit, "Aw, thanks Seifer, you're looking pretty damn sexy yoursel--"  
  
"AHEM!" Selphie yelled, "Could we PLEASE start?  
  
"Ok," Quistis and Seifer replied in harmony.  
  
"Ok, Seifer, you're walking out in that little strut you do," Selphie pointed from the right wing of the stage to the center front.  
  
"What strut?" Seifer asked, tilting his head to the side.  
  
"Y'know! The one that you always do with your posse?"  
  
"Oh, that one. Ok," Seifer smirked.  
  
"Then, you're gonna come down BEHIND to Seifer, Quistis," Selphie's finger wandered from the left wing to the center of the stage, "Then, Seifer turns around and beckons Quistis to come down. After that, he starts doing the Kung Fu Macarena!"  
  
"I do what?" Seifer's eyes widened.  
  
"You do this, silly!" Selphie demostrated once again.  
  
She strutted down the stage in a super model walk. Then she pretended to motion Quistis forward. Next came the Macarena. "Punch punch, kick kick, jump-pivot, hands on butt, SWIIIING, jump-pivot. Seifer and the others will put their hands on the back of their heads and do a pelvic thrust like so," Selphie thrust her hips forward with a grunt and everyone giggled.  
  
"You hafta get the grunt in along with the 'HOU' in the song or it'll be all messed up," Selphie instructed.  
  
"That's great, Selph, but what do I do?"  
  
"Teehee! You'll be doing the same thing as me, Quisty! When the guys do their little pelvic thrust, you also put your hands on the back of your head, but instead of the pelvic thrust, you swing your hips to the side, to Seifer."  
  
Quistis stared at Selphie in disbelief. Seifer stood there as well, but instead of staring, he grinned. Irvine came out in his brand new WHITE boxers (hehe. *coough*) Quistis shrugged and swung her hips to the left. "Woohoo! Go Quistis!" Zell called from the bushes.  
  
"I thought I got rid of you," Seifer stomped over to the bushes and pushed Zell back into them.  
  
Thuds could be heard as Zell rolled down the hill at an ever-increasing rate. "Quit hurting the other dancers!" Selphie whined.  
  
Squall looked up from his dismal look, "Selphie, what do we do?"  
  
"YOU just sit there and look depressed, got it, Puberty Boy?" Seifer pushed Squall's left shoulder.  
  
"Maldición tú, Seifero," was all that could be heard from below since Zell was stuck in the bushes.  
  
"Stop cussing in Spanish!" Quistis yelled down at Zell.  
  
"Maldición zorra," Zell mumbled.  
  
"I heard that!" Quistis screamed.   
  
Selphie cleared her throat loudly and turned to Squall. "You, Zell, and Irvine will be on the sides. You'll come out with Quistis, Zell comes out by himself, and I'll come out with Irvine, teehee!"  
  
"...whatever."  
  
Rinoa dragged Zell back up, battered and dirtied. Seifer chuckled at the disensembled blonde. Squall just shook his head. "Okie, Zell, Irvine, Squall, lemme show you what to do."  
  
The three other guys walked over to Selphie and gathered in a little huddle. The only thing that gave the others a clue of what was going on was Selphie's finger pointing every which way and Irvine's numerous comments of 'grinding.'  
  
"Ok! Let's do a run-through of this!" Selphie clapped her hands together as everyone else slumped over to the wings of the stage.   
  
The music blared and Seifer strutted out...   
  
[What happens? Stay tuned!]  



	5. Running Through It--Literally.

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Disclaimer: The characters don't belong to me, but the story does...I think Forgive the lyrics if their wrong, I couldn't find them, so I just listened to the song over and over again. Kung Fu Fighting is © Bus Stop Feat. I don't intend to discriminate anyone in these actions, I'm just trying to think of dance moves to the lyrics. It would be a lot funnier if I could show you the whole dance, but unfortunately, the characters aren't real and I don't have a web cam. Poo.  
====================  
  
Ooooh...  
Seifer struts out.  
  
Ooooh...  
Quistis steps out.  
  
Ooooh...  
Seifer beckons her to come up.  
  
Ooooh...  
Quistis smirks and walks up to him.  
  
Everybody was Kung-Fu fighting!  
Seifer punches in the air while Quistis watches.  
  
Oh those kids were fast as lightning!  
Quistis imitates the punches, her punches in sync with the words.  
  
In fact it was a little bit frightening  
Seifer shies away from Quistis a little.  
  
But they fought with expert timing!  
Seifer and Quistis spar with each other.  
  
They were funky China men  
Squall and Zell strut out, stopping at the sides and stroking pretend beards.  
  
From funky China Town  
Clap hands over head to imitate a pagoda. Egyptian head thang.  
  
They were chopping them up  
Irvine and Selphie hop out and run between Seifer and Quistis, giving a "Bring it on" look.  
  
They were chopping them down  
Quistis and Seifer pretend to karate chop Irvine and Selphie down.  
  
It's an ancient Chinese art  
Quistis and Seifer go into a fighting stance.  
  
And everybody does their part  
Selphie and Irvine hop from side to side.  
  
They make a fainted little slip  
Selphie pretends to dodge Irvine. Irvine follows through with his pretend punch and falls down.  
  
And they kick you from the hip!  
Seifer looks over at Irvine and Quistis kicks his hip  
  
Everybody was kung-fu fighting  
*Beginning of the Kung-fu Macarena* Everyone: punch punch.  
  
HUH!  
Pelvic thrust from the guys.  
  
Those kids were fast as lightning!  
Kick Kick  
  
HUH!  
Thrust hips.  
  
In fact it was a little bit frightening,  
Hands on bootys, swiiing! Jump-pivot.  
  
HOU!  
Jump kick.  
  
But they fought with expert timing.  
Jump pivot. Hands on back of head.   
  
HUH!  
Guys do a pelvic thrust (prrrf..) Girls swing their hips to the guys seductively.  
  
Oooh...  
Squall and Zell look at each other, noticing that a verse is missing. They shrug and continued to shrug their shoulders from side to side, along with the beat.  
  
HUH!  
Selphie and Irvine do what Squall and Zell are doing, but kick out.  
  
Ooooh...  
Seifer is in a cowboy riding a horse position, hands on the back of his head. His knees are bent slightly, and his upper body is still. He stands on the balls of his feet, heels moving from side to side and stepping on the ground at the sound of the drum. *sorry, couldn't describe it very well.*  
  
HA!  
Rinoa jumps in suddenly, swinging her hips to the side at Squall.  
  
Oooh...  
Selphie glares at Rinoa and lips out, "What are you DOING?!"  
  
HUH!  
Zell and Irvine pretend nothing's going on and continue with the pelvic thrusts on cue.  
  
Ooooh...  
Selphie stamps over to Rinoa, tackling her and knocking Squall over.   
  
HA!  
Squall, Rinoa, and Selphie fall onto the ground with a thud. Zell runs over to check and Irvine kicks him over the stage.  
  
Everybody was Kung-fu fighting!  
Seifer and Quistis look over their shoulders, trying to see what's going on.  
  
HUH!  
You know....hehe.  
  
Oh yeah, those kids were fast as lightning  
Kick Kick. Jump-pivot. Irvine runs up next to Quistis and winks at her.  
  
HAH!  
Seifer glares at Irvine.  
  
In fact, it was a little bit frightening  
Hands on bon bons, SWIIING! Jump-pivot. Irvine winks at Quistis again.  
  
HOU!  
Plevic thrust.  
  
Make sure you fight with expert timing!  
Irvine sticks his tongue out at Seifer. Seifer takes this as the straw that broke the camel's back and storms over to Irvine.  
  
HUH!  
Seifer punches, Irvine dodges.  
  
Ooooh...  
Quistis looks at the two, then lip syncs.  
  
HU--  
Music is cut off by Selphie. A pile of bodies next to the boombox. Zell's leg twitches as Squall mumbles, "...."   
  
Rinoa slides out from under Zell. Selphie's hair is in disarray. Seifer and Irvine are duking it out as Quistis yells at them to stop. "I think that went rather well," Selphie said with a smile, "But it needs a little work...TAKE IT FROM THE TOP PEOPLE!"  
  
"Arg..." Squall groaned.  
  
[See ya next chapter!--Bink, the cat who can type]  



	6. Showtime!

====================  
Disclaimer: The characters don't belong to me, but the story does...I think Forgive the lyrics if their wrong, I couldn't find them, so I just listened to the song over and over again. Kung Fu Fighting is © Bus Stop Feat. I don't intend to discriminate anyone in these actions, I'm just trying to think of dance moves to the lyrics. It would be a lot funnier if I could show you the whole dance, but unfortunately, the characters aren't real and I don't have a web cam. Poo.  
====================  
"My God, look at that crowd..." Squall grumbled as he peeked out the curtain.  
  
"Getting nervous, puberty boy?" Seifer asked, tapping his bare foot on the wooden stage.   
  
"...." Squall replied and pushed his way past Seifer, who was smirking at him mockingly.  
  
"Squaaaaaaaaaall!!" Rinoa screeched as she tackled him to the ground.  
  
'Man, she's heavier than I thought,' Squall's mind said to himself.  
  
"Squall! Tell Selphie that she's a meany poo-poo head and she should let me dance!"  
  
"...Whatever," was Squall's answer.   
  
The brunnette walks over to a small crowd of Balamb students, also performing for the talen show. The backstage was dimly lit, which was contrasted well with the over-lighted stage. Squall couldn't even look out without getting blinding, how could he possibly dance? Quistis talked with Selphie, apparently trying to talk her out of the dance. Something about "too much focus around the pelvic area." Selphie, being incredibly stubborn, said that those moves were going to win them the contest. The blonde whispered in her ear and Selphie's eyes widened. She dashed off the stage, heading to the dorms. Quistis chuckled and turned her attention to Zell, who indignantly and nonchalanty gave his butt a small scratch, thinking no one would notice. Seifer piped up, not being the one to hold back an embarassing moment for Zell, "Hey Zell, how 'bout I give your ass a scratch with my foot?"  
  
Zell's eyes brightened, "Oh, that would be so nice, Seifer!"  
  
Slapping his forehead, Seifer mumbled something about Zell being an idiot, gay, and a momma's boy. Before Zell could comprehend the mumbling, Selphie burst in, dragging a whining, kicking, screaming Irvine behind her, "We're on! We're on!"  
  
Everyone's eyes widened in disbelief. None of them thought they were the first act, but there was no turning back now. Selphie pushed them on stage and had to help Squall get up, since Rinoa was clinging onto his lower leg and refused to leg go. Hobbling on stage, Squall stood with the rest as Selphie presented them to the enormous crowd. Seifer stood, arms crossed and looking all bad ass. Quistis rolled her eyes and relaxed her hands on her hips. Zell looked around nervously, scratching his rump every so often. Irvine looked from side to side nervously, with one of those anime sweat drops. After the overly long introduction containing the overuse of "tee-hee"s and "booyaka"s, Selphie skipped back stage followed by the rest. Pressing the 'power' button to the boombox, the music started, but then stopped abruptly.   
  
Giving the boombox an encouraging kick, Selphie grumbled while Seifer just pointed and laughed. Zell complained that he was hungry as Squall bent down to examine the device. Irvine threatened to shoot the box, but with that, it began playing. Scurrying to their places, Seifer began his move, followed by Quistis. By the time the second line of music was done, it stopped once again. Loud groans are heard from back stage, and then suddenly, the Barney theme starts playing. Looking at each other helplessly, Quistis and Seifer look at each other, then at the crowd, back at each other, and then at the crowd once more. Selphie hissed choice profanities under her breath as she tried to turn off the boombox, but it was gone. For a whole minute, Quistis and Seifer swayed back and forth, lip syncing the words the best they could. Much shouting of certain unmentionable words were heard from the backstage as Selphie screamed her vocal cords out.   
  
Suddenly, Irvine comes running out, a metal chair followed closely behind, just barely missing the cowboy as it tumbled over the stage into the crowd. Assuming they knew what was going on, the group started chanting, "JER-RY JER-RY!"  
  
Catching on, Quistis and Seifer pulled up chairs and sat down, Zell skipping in as host and they started a whole little episode with arguing, profanity, and chair-throwing. They were rewarded with a round of applause when the right song finally came up. Sitting up quickly, the group began to dance the best they could, basically winging the whole thing. Instead of pretending to punch him, Selphie tried with all her heart to give Irvine a black eye for ruining the song. Again, they were positively reinforced as the whole crowd jeered and some called for an encore. Zell stood up and started dancing, but not for long as Selphie and Squall dragged him away and Quistis, Seifer, and a thoroughly frightened Irvine followed.   
  
=====  
It's almost over, one more chapter!  
===== 


	7. The Aftermath

=====  
Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine *heavy sigh* they all belong to Squaresoft *cheers*, so none of them are mine *heavy sigh*.  
=====  
  
Dance Dance Fantasy!  
  
By Binkari  
  
Chapter 7: The Aftermath  
  
  
  
Squall sat on his bed, his azure eyes wandering the room. He looked at his gunblade, to his desk, which was littered with papers, and back to the window. It had been 2 days since the talent show, and everyone was regaining their dignity. Selphie said the show was absolutely marvelous, even when Nida was trying to act like Leonardo DiCaprio in Titanic. Squall had to admit that some of the acts were clever, like the Trepies trying to dress up as one big Quistis. He couldn't help but smile after remembering the look on poor Quisty's face when she saw them.   
  
The phone rang. Reaching over ever so slowly, Squall lifted the receiver and pressed it to his ear. He was greeted with the voice of Rinoa, "SQUALL!!! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL SELPHIE TO LET ME DANCE?! I HATE YOU RIGHT NOW! YOU BIG...POO POO HEAD! Y'know what?! You didn't even dance that well! All you did was walk around the stage like a big...POO POO HEAD and do what you did! That's sooooo stupid! You big...POO POO HE--"  
  
Catching on (rather slowly...), Squall reached over for the plastic wrapper of a piece of candy he had had earlier. Crinkling and rubbing it against the bottom of the phone, Squall replied in erratic voice, "Rinoa...this...sta...tic is he...ll! I'll talk to yo...u...later...al..l right?!"  
  
"Squall! You're not fooling me with that candy wrapper gig! Why, I remember when you tried that on Quistis when you wanted to get lazy and not go to the training last week! You did that when you had to talk to my dad...and it wasn't even on the phone! All you did was rub the wrapper against your li--"  
  
He grumbled, "...Whatever." Then, Squall stopped her, "Rinoa! I think I'm...I think I'm..ack! The phone's slipping out of my hands an--" he placed the phone back down on its hook and leaned back, satisfied with his elusiveness.   
  
Just then the phone rang again, Squall leaned back and waited for the answering machine to get it. Finally, her heard the click and the tape being recording, "SQUALL! I know you're there! Answer me! That's it, we are sooooooooo over! Take that, you big...POO POO HEAD!" Click.  
  
Shrugging his shoulders, Squall turned back to meditating in his room. Suddenly, there was a crisp knock on the door. Hobbling over to the door, Squall opened it just a crack and was greeted with a shoulder. It was clad in a gray sleeve with a red cross stained into it in blood red. It could be none other than..."Yo, puberty boy."  
  
Seifer.  
  
"Tilmitt wants u--you at the quad. Go now before she starts tee-heeing her way over here."  
  
Nodding, Squall closed the door behind him. He felt Seifer smirking evilly from the back, but paid no heed to it. Making his way over to the quad, he saw the rest of the talent show gang sitting along the stage. Zell was holding a grand old conversation with a light, but threw his hot dog at it when it apparently made a subtle insult of his mother's cooking.   
  
"...." Squall grumbled as he sat down next to Quistis, "Where's Rinoa?"  
  
"She was on the balcony. So I figured that I could go get a hot dog and when I came back she was...well, not on the balcony," Zell explained.  
  
"For the last time, I didn't do it!" Quistis bursted out. She sat back down quickly as everyone turned to her and looked at her oddly.  
  
"...Whatever."  
  
"Teehee! The talent show was great, you guys! Even if some of us couldn't dance! I reserved a spot for us in the NEXT show. So get ready!" Selphie jeered.  
  
Everyone's eyes widened to was resembled a dinner plate. Selphie nodded gleefully. She turned around to gather up the costumes she had prepared, "Now, I'm pretty sure all of your have stopped growing, but just in case, I made these costumes a size larger so it won't be too small for the next sho--guys? Girls? People...?" The once cheerful girl stood there, dumbfounded at the empty quad.  
  
Just then, Zell jumped out of the bushes, scaring the living daylights out of Selphie as he picked something out of the light, "Forgot my hot dog." Nodding quickly, he jumped back into the bushes, leaving Selphie, once again, alone and confused.   
  
Selphie grumbled under her breath, "For once, I wish Irvine was here to cuddle me."  
  
As if he read her mind, Irvine ran in, arms open, "C'mere baby!"   
  
She grinned, "You're always here to dance!"  
  
Hearing this, Irvine kept running and ran straight through the bushes. Suddenly, the whole stage fell over as Selphie soon found it was just made of cardboard! The foam birds fell from the skys as the pixelated tree broke down. Looking about, scared, Selphie heard a voice, "Whoops, forgot to fix that glitch."  
  
Yelling to the Squaresoft employee, Selphie screeched, "You could have at least waited until AFTER the fanfic, AFTER!"  
  
"Sorry." whimpers the employee as he used his spiffy computer program to put everything back together.  
  
  
  
  
  
===And that's the end of that chapter! ^^;=== 


End file.
